The Dim Sum Diaries

Title: The Dim Sum Diaries Address: http://chiuster.blogspot.com Author: Mir From: Carlsbad Blogging since: March 2003 Post Date: December 8, 2006

Post Title: OMFG Now that I have inhabited this plane of existence for 34.5 years, my tastes in certain things have changed. I still enjoy fiction (Nicole Krauss's History of Love is a good example), but except for my all-time fave authors like Lisa Kleypas, I'm not so big on impulse buys for romances anymore. So imagine my SHOCK AND HORROR when I got this e-mail from Amazon.com: Dear Amazon.com customer...perhaps you might enjoy this book!!! Pregnancy of Passion (Harlequin Presents).

Pregnancy? Of Passion? Dear God.

The book blurb must be read with a fake, BAD Italian or Spanish accent otherwise you won't do it justice:

"It was a year since their tempestuous affair had ended. So why was he back? Elisa trusted Salvatore di Vitale as far as she could throw him. And, as the wealthy Sicilian was over six feet tall, that wasn't very far.

"Salvatore told Elisa he had come to protect her. And if their close proximity led to passion... and if passion should lead to pregnancy, all the better! Because then Elisa would have to marry him, which was Salvatore's plan all along."

Holy crap, it's Tom Cruise!

Yeah, Amazon.com...I don't think I'll be buying this book anytime soon...thank you very much.

Post Date: November 21, 2006

Post Title: Happy Thanksgiving Week! Went with Hubby last weekend to Gencon to meet up with a friend we know from World of Warcraft. Was slightly hesitant to seal my fate as a complete and utter geek in the eyes of my sister, as I asked her to watch the kids for the day whilst Hubby and I indulged ourselves in Gencon. "Where are you going, again?" she demanded.

"Umm...you know, this game con, to meet up with some friends."

"What kind of games?"

"Hmm...good question. D&D type stuff, I think."

"Are you going to dress up?"

"Fuck no! Only dorks dress up. I am so over that."

"You did dress up as Captain Janeway FOR TWO YEARS IN A ROW for Halloween," she pointed out. "How do I know you're not hiding the outfit in the car?"

"For the love of God, N. (sis), I am not that geeky, ok?"

"Uh-huh." She remained unconvinced.

So off Hubby and I went, and it was quite interesting. I've never been into the trading cards or table-top games, but I wanted to go and see what it was all about. Oh, how I wish my cell phone hadn't run out of batteries, so I could've taken some pictures. There was a booth selling cloaks, foam weapons, and an entire booth devoted to dice (every shape, color, and size you can imagine). There were rows and rows of tables set up so people could play games. I even played a table-top game. It was all about math and dice on this mini board that was square and landscaped (mini trees, houses as if from a train station model). You measure out the distance your armies can move with a tape measure (interesting), and, based on your dice rolling and the stats of your armies, you hit, miss, etc. I played Hubby and was singlehandedly kicking his ass until Helexa had to cheat and give him loaded dice. So I lost, but only just. Bloody men with small penises trying to compensate.

Though it was fun irritating the hell out of everyone by shouting out "I WIN! I WIN!" every time I rolled.

The biggest draw was Blizzard booth, where they had a perky Asian girl hosting and throwing prizes to a group of extremely eager young men who all pointed north toward her. It was amazing. We had dinner and overall had a good time. Apparently table-top games are big on the East Coast and in the Midwest, not so much in California. But it was interesting to see another aspect of geekery I have no intention of getting into. I will not dress up as a female elf in a leather bustier and g-string, no matter how much Hubby begs.

Post Date: November 10, 2006

Post Title: Baby, You Still Got Game! On the darkest hour of the darkest night, she lay in her bed sleeping, but it was not a restful sleep. It was fitful, really; she must have been dreaming about something that bothered her, for there was much twisting and turning. In the end, she settled by sleeping in a reverse of her usual position, her head at the footboard and her feet resting on her pillow. The air was very cold, so she'd wrapped herself up completely in her soft, flannel blanket for warmth, looking rather like a blue burrito. The doorknob to her bedroom slowly turned and the door creaked open. A shadowy figure quietly slipped in and paused for a moment, gauging the scene before him. His eyes sharpened as he saw the burrito-shaped blob, a multitude of thoughts racing through his mind. He walked over to his side of the bed and slipped in, carefully adjusting his sheets and curling over to the furry blue mass' pillow next to him. It was still completely dark as he pulled down the blanket and gave his wife a deep, urgent, and longing kiss.

Suddenly he jumped back in shock. "Oh my God!" he cried. "Do not tell me I just kissed the bottom of your foot goodnight!"

The Blue Burrito looked up from the foot of the bed. "Tried to slip it some tongue, too. Dork."