No Toking, Please

When the Steve Miller Band plays Embarcadero Marina Park South on Saturday, May 28, the band's lounge should be stocked with six grilled chicken breasts ("cold, sliced thin"), one gallon vegetarian soup ("homemade"), one whole melon ("cantaloupe, honeydew, water, casaba, etc."), tortilla chips ("one bag unsalted, two bags salted"), a pint of guacamole ("no supermarket prepackaged"), a "bunch" of fresh cilantro and "twelve cloves fresh garlic." Drinks must include a half case of Corona beer, a half case of Coors Light, a half case of Heineken, a half case of "local microbrewery," a six-pack of nonalcoholic beer ("prefer Haake Beck or Clausthauler"), and "one quart acidophilus milk." Miller "requires that no Styrofoam products be used in any application" and asks that the staff "act in an environmentally sound fashion."

Space cowboys should act with decorum because "Any member of the audience who is openly drunk [or] under the influence of illegal substances...is to be ejected from the venue immediately." If you have crappy seats, note that "The crowd may approach the stage during the last two songs...prior to the encore and during the encore."

When Nine Inch Nails appears at Soma May 30 and 31, they want their hospitality room provided with "proper place settings to include linen napkins, china plates, bowels [sic], cups, saucers and real silverware for fifteen people." Libations: 12 bottles of Budweiser beer, 12 Bud Lights, 12 cans of Red Bull, 12 assorted Snapples, a box of soy milk, and "two bottles of very good wine (Cabernet Sauvignon, no Merlot)." Munchies: eight power bars, one box of granola bars, a pint of plain unflavored yogurt, two packs of Altoids mints, a variety pack of Kellogg's cereals, and two boxes of cornstarch are listed as "very important." Also noted as "important" is a "very large selection of washed, uncut vegetables (beets, carrots, celery, spinach, etc.) for juicer." (From thesmokinggun.com)