When Metallica Plays the Sports Arena

When Metallica plays the Sports Arena next Wednesday, their 14-page backstage rider assures they'll put aside widely chronicled differences long enough to play a full set, barring "sickness, inability to perform, accident, fire, failure of means of transportation, failure of power and technical difficulties, Act of God, riots, strikes, labor disputes, epidemics or any other act or order of any public authority" outside Metallica's control. "General liability" insurance must be purchased against the performance for $5 million.

Ten backstage or on-site rooms must be provided, including the band's dressing room, a "Food & Schmooze" room (with three banquet tables, a sofa, loveseat, and 12 chairs), a "Tuning Room" with four padded folding chairs ("no arms"), a separate "Wardrobe Room," a "Tech Room," offices for "Production," "Management," and "Accounting," and a "Pyro Room" for the fireworks crew ("no carpeting, if possible").

Metallica's dressing room needs two one-liter bottles of Schweppes diet tonic water ("please no two-liter bottles"), six 20-oz. bottles each of Glaceau brand "Revive" fruit punch mineral water and "Energy" tropical citrus vitamin water, six bottles of Hi-O-Silver oxygen water, six cans of Red Bull ("sugar free"), and 12-packs of Heineken, Corona, and Coors Light ("must be in cans, please"). Five "small containers" of yogurt must be provided ("1 raspberry, 1 blueberry, 1 strawberry, and two vanilla") as well as a bowl of fresh hummus, a bag of miniature chocolates, two bars of "good dark chocolate candy," and two boxes of "cube shaped" tissues. Guitarists Kirk Hammett and James Hetfield request side-stage refreshments: four 20-oz. bottles each of lemon-lime "original flavor" Gatorade.

At least 38 security guards must police the barricade between band and audience. And finally, "There shall be no announcements, no emcee, no welcoming speeches" from the stage before Metallica plays.

Tickets are selling at online agencies like advancetickets.com for $315.