The 116th edition of the Boston Marathon ground runners to a pulp with 80 degree weather on Monday. The men’s winner finished in a mediocre 2:12:40. Come on, that’s an average pace of about 5:05 per mile.

Weak.That’s the second slowest time since 1985. However, considering over a hundred runners ended up being ambulanced to the hospital perhaps “balls” is a better sentiment. His average pace was faster than most of us can run period.

According to research at some university somewhere, the ideal running temperature is 50-55 degrees. Runners start feeling the effects of temperature at 65 degrees. Once it hits 80, it becomes torture.

Would you believe the winners were Kenyon? Wesely Korir was the men’s champion and Sharon Cherop was the women’s.

For those readers who may not be familiar with the Africa-distance-running-domination, researchers at universities credit the altitude and equatorial heat of Kenya and Ethiopia as being the factors that count. The location near the equator takes the sting off of the altitude chill and creates moderate conditions which are ideal for distance training.

These two countries sit on either side of The Great Rift Valley where the altitude averages about 7,000 feet and can get up to 9,000. The key is to be born at altitude. Training at altitude does help but the higher red-blood-cell counts of the mountain born mean more oxygen to the muscles during exertion.

Former New England Patriot and stroke survivor Tedy Bruschi also “ran” the Boston Marathon this year. I say “ran” in quotes because his time was 5:26:02, that’s about a 12:45 per mile pace.

In a race where most of the field is required to qualify based on their age and their time in another sanctioned marathon event, 12:45 per mile is below expectations. Qualifying for Boston is a bucket list goal for runners who actually train.

I’ll chalk this up as another reason to hate the Patriots. Yes, yes, he was running to raise stroke awareness. We’re all much more aware now—I guess.