In the town of La Jolla, at the edge of Scripps Park
Grew a Monterey Cypress, full of sap, leaves, and bark.
A healthy old tree, and quite famous to boot
Since it helped Dr. Seuss make a boatload of loot.
That tree and no other was fluffy enough
To start the Doc thinking of something called Truff-
ula — yes! What an excellent name!
(He asked his friend Lorax, and he thought the same.)
And in no time at all, he’d published a tale
That made the old Onceler look destined to fail.
A mismanaged market, a finite supply
A fiasco to blame on a self-centered guy.
But fifty years later, the truth can be told
Old bosses don’t fail, they don’t even get old!
The tree was a relic, its race had been run
Once Seuss made his money, its work was all done.
UNLESS, I surmised — and my thinking was sound —
UNLESS some new path to a profit was found.
And that’s why I felled it, and chopped it in chunks
Into branches, and twigs, even slices of trunks.
The tree from the plea to keep old Earth alive
Can be yours — well, in part — for just $12.95.