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Excerpts from the four-entry diary of an Anonymous volunteer at Occupy San Diego. First, euphoria tempered with concern for the future:

Post Date: October 11, 2011

Since I have come back to the camp the tents have become a sort of city, with walkways and tents; the comfort tent, the art tent, the sanitation tent, the people’s clinic…and the ever-busy kitchen. It’s such a wonderful feeling being here. There is this sense of safety, of hope, of caring, of helpfulness. It’s a beautiful thing to see everyone volunteering to take care of everyone. People here are kind and quick to help each other out, and there has been zero violence here. I wonder, though, how long this will last; food goes fast and donations will run out one day. People will get too familiar with each other, and there may be bickering. I sincerely hope that we can continue on with this utopia. This is the happiest I’ve ever been.

Second, anxiety over fragmentation and stagnation, plus the specter of Anonymous.

Post Date: October 12, 2011

I am trying to keep up with the Facebook page for Occupy San Diego, and just reading through tires me out. I’m not about the politics…. From what I hear and read, it’s a constant cyclical argument that never seems to be solved. I stick to what I know: how to organize and get shit done! I leave the debates to the people that have the energy and knowledge to sit through those assemblies.

I don’t agree with having a 100% consensus [before taking action], because nothing will ever be accomplished that way. Even if the point makes sense and is a great idea, there is going to be that douchebag who just wants to make things difficult because he’s an Anon who’s doing it “for the lulz.” And you can’t fight against that; it’s the way the Anons work. I am an Anon, and I get it — which is why they have no place at serious meetings.

Third, a consideration of leadership, violence, and Anonymous.

Post Date: October 13, 2011

I keep hearing rumors about the Anarchists — that they want to start violence to get media attention. Really? They think that’s a good idea? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not naïve enough to think that this revolution will not incur casualties. But if violence can be avoided, then it’s best that it’s avoided. It’s immature; it’s an unhealthy way of garnering attention because everyone knows that Anarchy is ridiculous.

We need to have a leader. This is essential even if it’s just a figurehead. The media can’t speak to all of us and if there is one person who is informed we can better promote this protest. I will continue to insist upon this. I just feel like nothing is really being solved and it’s not helping our image. It looks like we’re a bunch of pissed-off people that don’t have their shit together and are simply on the “band wagon.”

I’d like to address the issue of Anonymous; we will need them one day. They are a force to be reckoned with, and they have the numbers to help us win or lose this fight. But we cannot convince them to do anything, so don’t try — one of their slogans is, “Not your personal army.” They act “for the lulz.” We cannot try and provoke them. I insist that we all celebrate the 5th of November [Guy Fawkes Day]; not just for them, but for US. You can disagree with the way [Fawkes] chose to send his message, but at least he was trying to send a message.

My god the Facebook page is exhausting. People would not be so bold if it were in person, and that’s annoying. Uggghhhhh if we can’t agree with each other, then we are doomed. This.Is.Why.We.Need.A.Leader.

Finally, an ominous farewell.

Post Date: October 15, 2011

My work here is done.

We are Anonymous. We are Legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect Us.

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