The Six-Million-Dollar Bra

Heymatt:

It seems like I just did something that really pissed off my girlfriend. While I try to figure out what it was, I think I need a gift for her. What's the most expensive thing in the world?

-- Mickey, in the doghouse

Can we assume that you don't want to follow the herd that's going to buy this year's Victoria's Secret Fantasy Bra? "Hearts on Fire," they call it. Encrusted with 2000 round diamonds and a ten-carat brooch --$6.5 million. That's 3.25 mil per cup. But every schmo swoops in on Victoria's when he's in a jam. Make the effort to take her to England, where a bar will shake or stir a $27,000 martini with a diamond in place of the olive. Maybe $2700 per sip? While you're there, pick up a $7500 diamond-encrusted tea bag -- 250 stones, 0 caffeine. I'd say about $2500 per dunk. Oh, those Brits!

But maybe your miffed muffin is a philatelist. Maybe she can even spell philatelist! So let's look at a little blue number called the 1868 Benjamin Franklin Z Grill. One of the only two existing was just involved in a high-profile swap that made the stamp worth about three mil. By our calculations, that's $3 trillion an ounce.

Not good enough? (Dang, man, what did you do?!) Only one more thing to try. The most expensive thing in the world, at least according to all the sources I could find. Imagine the smile on her face when you offer up her very own gram of antimatter. About $62 trillion, more or less. Antihydrogen is the only flavor available at the moment, but the science guys hope for more. They can whip it up in the lab, apparently harder than creating it in the exhaust of the Starship Enterprise.