Help! My legs fall asleep when I'm on the toilet.

Wizard of Alice:

How come my legs fall asleep when I'm on the toilet but not when I'm working at my computer?

-- RV, the net

I really don't want to know any more about your personal habits, RV, but I assume you spend considerable time on the pot. Can you appreciate that toilet seats are not designed to offer mankind hours of relaxation? Toilets, in general, are designed to be sanitary and to clean up easily, not for butt comfort. The biggest problem with toilet seats, though, is that one size is supposed to fit all. If you look at a row of butts on bar stools you can see that's not possible. Our hinder parts come in too many shapes and sizes. According to chair-seat experts, a user-friendly, ergonomic toilet seat would be flatter and wider for better support; have a narrower hole; would be sloped slightly inward; be longer in front for better support under the thighs; and have the front edge curved downward so it doesn't press into the backs of the sitter's legs. The edge of the seat is hitting you in a bad spot in the back or your legs, causing pinched nerves and snoozing feet. Don't lean forward while you sit. That makes it worse.

A Japanese company has designed an ergonomically correct, padded, heated toilet seat/bidet combination named Zo that will run you about $600. Or save the coin; cut a hole in the seat of your well designed computer chair and acquire a chamber pot. Problem solved.