John Donne 9 p.m., May 27
Weird in PB: God Parked Out Front Today?
On the corner of Cass and Chalcedony streets in Pacific Beach resides a building boldly displaying the text "God's Garage." In an arguably bolder move "I (heart) DildoDr.com" is crookedly affixed on the front of a decrepit late 70's van - the kind you were warned to stay away from as a child. When the planets align, Dr. Dildo's van parks right in front of God's Garage.
In an investigative hunt for the truth, I learned God's Garage is owned by Christ Lutheran Church, and is used for Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. I also learned that The Dildo Dr. specializes in hypoallergenic glass dildos.
"God has a plan for me," claims John Byrd (Dr. Dildo). "I park by the sign 'God's Garage' because it's great for marketing. I just happen to live right here," he tells me via email.
Keenly aware of the creepy vibe the van exudes, Byrd explains it is completely intentional and meant to be humorous with a slant towards the surreal. He refers to the van as "Lil' Creepy," and says it took him over 18 months to find just the right vehicle for the job.
"Sex education starts in the home, not the internet. My sites are Rated G for Good times, not X for pornography. Sex is fun. Smart sex is safe sex & safe sex is fun. I started this business because every day in life is special to me. I want to be successful, have fun, and help others. Life is short, live it. Spending time judging others just limits your growth. Be your own person, do your own thing. Become a doctor... I did, and I fucking love it."
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