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Ersatz News Source: New Central Library Building Tee-Pee’d; De Maio Considers Budapest Offer

New Central Library Building Tee-Pee’d (11/1/12)

Construction crews at the city’s new Central Library arrived at work this morning to find the building’s impressive dome had been tee-pee’d on Halloween Night. As an apparent prank, a great amount of toilet paper was used to cover the 24-foot tall dome that tops the nearly completed structure. Flying toilet paper completely wrapped around the dome and could be seen flying in the wind from as far away at Interstate 5. According to one of the crewmembers, “That sure is a damn lot of toilet paper. They had some real fun last night.” Workers notified police who soon arrived to document the incident. Officers said they had no immediate suspects, but mentioned a large case of toilet paper was stolen from the US Grant Hotel earlier this week.

De Maio Considers Budapest Offer (11/1/12)

A former member of Carl De Maio’s office staff leaked information regarding a possible plan the Council Member’s has in the event he is not elected as the new Mayor of San Diego. The individual, who requested anonymity, told the San Diego Reader, De Maio has had ongoing discussions with prominent people in Budapest, Hungary, where he vacationed on several occasions. The informer said, De Maio was been offered a position as Mayor of that city if he would be willing to make significant investments to the area infrastructure and industry. De Maio reportedly had last responded to the offer as contingent on the election outcome and his ability to learn the Hungarian language.

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Melissa Etheridge, The Imaginary Amazon

Events April 1-April 3, 2024

New Central Library Building Tee-Pee’d (11/1/12)

Construction crews at the city’s new Central Library arrived at work this morning to find the building’s impressive dome had been tee-pee’d on Halloween Night. As an apparent prank, a great amount of toilet paper was used to cover the 24-foot tall dome that tops the nearly completed structure. Flying toilet paper completely wrapped around the dome and could be seen flying in the wind from as far away at Interstate 5. According to one of the crewmembers, “That sure is a damn lot of toilet paper. They had some real fun last night.” Workers notified police who soon arrived to document the incident. Officers said they had no immediate suspects, but mentioned a large case of toilet paper was stolen from the US Grant Hotel earlier this week.

De Maio Considers Budapest Offer (11/1/12)

A former member of Carl De Maio’s office staff leaked information regarding a possible plan the Council Member’s has in the event he is not elected as the new Mayor of San Diego. The individual, who requested anonymity, told the San Diego Reader, De Maio has had ongoing discussions with prominent people in Budapest, Hungary, where he vacationed on several occasions. The informer said, De Maio was been offered a position as Mayor of that city if he would be willing to make significant investments to the area infrastructure and industry. De Maio reportedly had last responded to the offer as contingent on the election outcome and his ability to learn the Hungarian language.

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