Billy Collins 10 p.m., March 12
- Community Blog
- Daily Crasher
I remember as a kid watching TV commercials. Remote controls were still a relatively new item, and since you had to get up to change the channel, you just watched the channel you had on.
Some commercials were fun. The beer commercials were classics.
So now when I see a bad commercial, I wonder what the deal is.
I've only seen this spot a few times. It's for Burger King, and the ad campaign is calling people "Whopper Virgins." A term that I have to think, will have a few parents complain to the company. After all, Paris Hilton eating a Wendy's burger while washing her car garnered a bunch of complaints. Why wouldn't this?
The premise starts okay. They're going to take a Whopper to places where people don't eat them. They'll then have a "taste test" with the people. So, I see Eskimos. And it's cute that they have them saying they usually just eat seal burgers or whatever.
But, these taste tests are always a bad idea. Because, just mentioning Big Macs, well...that got me craving a Big Mac, not a Whopper.
Coke and Pepsi always do those, where one is mentioning the other. And, as much as we all remember the Super Bowl spot with the driver drinking the other cola, do we really remember which was which? And which he picked?
My next question comes from my 3 and a half years working for Mickey D's in high school.
The burgers we made only stayed for 10 minutes. They were then either sold or thrown away.
SO, how did they get Big Macs to the Eskimos? Did they go buy some in a McDonald's, and then transport them there? How good is that going to taste, after an 8 hour flight?
And later when I'm playing racquetball or swimming laps, I start thinking of how I would've created a commercial for Burger King. I'd avoid the word "virgin."
I might think about getting a Jared look alike (you know the dude...the slob from the Subway ads). I'd have him walking down the street, towards a Subway.
I'd have a Burger King truck pull up...maybe that scary looking King guy could get out, and offer him a burger. He could look around, scarf it down, and then go running in the opposite direction.
Instead, I'll just see in a few weeks, the next location Burger King "goes" (ie green screen in a studio in Burbank). It might be a tribe in a forest somewhere, where they only eat the animals they've caught.
And, they'll be speaking some clicking language we can't understand. But it will say on the screen, that they are saying how much they love the Whopper, and the Big Mac secret sauce scares them.