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is he just being a friend ..spin doctoring ...or LYING

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i had some interesting thoughts today visiting with people in the 2D world...and the 3D world..... it was about blogging Truth and fiction privacy and sharing...

non sequitors eh

this could become a problem of logic called "on the horns of a dilemma".....if A then not B...if B then not A....... what to do ...what to do ?

then there's that old Eastern philosophy of BOTH...that could really be a "hook em horns" moment

the need for privacy has become even more important in a world that bombards us thru every kind of media with messages....and in many ways "the message has become the massage"....spin doctoring and sound bites that are created to shock our brains into falling out of our own personal space into that of the massagers domain...whether it's print media or any other

they sometimes leave us with the monsterous feeling that we are not OK...worthy... safe....and especially not capable to reveiw and appraise the sincerity of others...especially in the 2D world....

IE: HE'S SO NICE...BUT MAYBE HE'S A 600LB GORILLA

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the ontological proof is certainly not available over a monitors screen is it ????????

but perhaps it is.. . ..and a great facilitator of that is sharing

not sharing your social security number or material about oneself that is dangerous....but sharing oneself.....ones essence ....

i've never completely understood the reasons not to share...what can be gained from it....if the sharing could cause someone to have a reluctance to continue sharing so what....no time wasted with someone who wouldn't like you if they did meet you in person... ..if you're an apple...and they like oranges...they will speed quickly to the orange crates and leave a space for apple lovers around you

i have this attitude of

NO RISK NO REWARD...

.it's has had me flying in the face of uncertainty for many years now....sometimes striking out...... sometimes rounding the bases for that all important home run

every morning while i meditate my first mantra is

SUSPEND DISBELIEF....

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all that means is take the key and unlock the doors....it doesn't mean that the screaming hordes are allowed to assail you....it just means you give them the chance to assail you....some primitive natives not well understood can be very nice...and if they're in print they can be ignored

take it from me they r usually "straw dogs". they only LOOK dangerous...

and even with their bluster...they may have something important to say between those F U's in their rants...LOL.....if you give them a chance....even if they're 600LBS gorillas.....look at Dennis Miller....he's made a career of it....LOL.....

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Grantie brought really good reasons to

be very afraid

i'm excluding flamers in this piece..the cruel mean spirited people who take pleasure in bullying and cruelty just to watch people squirm

these last few weeks we have watched a cyberwar go on here...there have been people writing to illuminate injustices...people creating injustice...people like me trying to use humor to defuse injustice

people angry...for any number of reasons...because they've been personally attacked...demeaned...given time outs

people marginalized because of age...race...education...need i go on with this???

the Raccoon Wars were amusing....but where r all the interesting wonderful bloggers that were here a month ago

i'm sitting in the corner spooning up a 1/2 gallon of Rocky Road and worrying about my weight

wondering if the comments that identified women my age as losers needs any extra thought on my part

looking in the mirror and thinking maybe Botox would improve my appearance. brain and writing ability

wanting a little **remove this comment** ditty beside every comment so that i personally could send flamers into cyberhell

teaching my wee terrier to "SIC EM"

and missing...much to my surprise...people i've NEVER met in real life

and that due to my homebound situation i may never meet in real life

who'da thunk it???

I WANT THEM BACK!!!

ALL MY FRIENDS AND EVEN SOME OF THE FORMIDABLE FOES

the ones with opinions...opinions not like mine...opinions well considered and presented with candor and without mean spiritedness or rancor

.i have on-line friends to whom i've only grown closer for 10 years who live 1000's of miles away from me and even over the pond in countries far away

and the only crimes i can accuse them of is stealing my cyberbeer

so i'm now officially on a mission to bring back the atmosphere that brought me here and kept me here in the first place

CONGENIALITY!!!

I'm sick of this Rocky Road...i'm switchin' to Vanilla

passing out cones

please come back

i may fall flat on my face but i'm tryin'

Comments

MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 10:36 a.m.

Nan, it's been my experience that on-line relationships devolve quickly because like e-mail, things written can be misunderstood. If you have never met a person in "real" life, there is no foundation to read less into words that others might take too literally. I don't know. Maybe it's because the more you share, the more others have to use against you. You think someone is your friend, only to discover their intent was sinister. I have little to hide, but there are some strange people out there.

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Founder July 17, 2010 @ 10:57 a.m.

My suggestion is demand a video chat, that way you "see what you are getting" before you actually have to meet up...

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 11:29 a.m.

i agree Ms Grant...but i'm excluding flamers in this piece..the cruel mean spirited people who take pleasure in bullying and cruelty just to watch people squirm

these last few weeks we have watched a cyberwar go on here...there have been people writing to illuminate injustices...people creating injustice...people like me trying to use humor to defuse injustice

people angry...for any number of reasons...because they've been personally attacked...demeaned...given time outs

people marginalized because of age...race...education...need i go on with this???

the Raccoon Wars were amusing....but where r all the interesting wonderful bloggers that were here a month ago

i'm sitting in the corner spooning up a 1/2 gallon of Rocky Road and worrying about my weight

wondering if the comments that identified women my age as losers needs any extra thought on my part

looking in the mirror and thinking maybe Botox would improve my appearance brain and writing ability

wanting a little remove this comment ditty beside every comment so that i personally could send flamers into cyberhell

teaching my wee terrier to "SIC EM"

and missing...much to my surprise...people i've NEVER met in real life

and that due to my homebound situation i may never meet in real life

who'da thunk it???

I WANT THEM BACK!!!

ALL MY FRIENDS AND EVEN SOME OF THE FORMIDABLE FOES

the ones with opinions...opinions not like mine...opinions well considered and presented with candor and without mean spiritedness or rancor

and dear Grantie...i have on-line friends to whom i've only grown closer for 10 years who live 1000's of miles away from me and even over the pond in countries far away

and the only crimes i can accuse them of is stealing my cyberbeer

so i'm now officially on a mission to bring back atmosphere that brought me here and kept me here

CONGENIALITY!!!

I'm sick of this Rocky Road...i'm switchin' to Vanilla

passing out cones

please come back

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ noon

i'm only looking for friends founder...writing friends...the tried and trued commodity alway entered into when ever peeps blog

Blogging is just the new fashion idea of an old fashion idea called Pen Pals

it's the "Poison Pen Pals" here that are pouring oil into our blogging water

it's not what they look like but what they say

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 12:10 p.m.

Some people can never come back. Some never should. Some promise never to come back and do. Some are on a summer vacation. Some are on a time out.

The possibilities are endless.

In the foreseeable future I think this is going to be a very vanilla world. But is there really anything wrong with vanilla ?

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 12:17 p.m.

i think every one who really want's to come back grasca could...those who can't need to do some soul seaching

Vanilla is nice..just gathering for a cone is a beginning

as a believer in REDEMPTION i personally could never say some never should

and my foreseeable future had better be 5 minutes ...because this ice cream is melting...:-))

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 12:21 p.m.

and as far as saying they'd never come back...that's usally said in anger...a short lived emotion that either clarifies or muddies any situation

life is only Black and white for those who r colourstupid or melancoliacs

most i've met here have range...a range of vision that doesn't see A directly next to Z...with no colorful engaging letters in between

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 12:27 p.m.

Excuse my while I make a cone. Mmmm. Okay, this was a far more interesting place to visit until some decided to go outside of the Reader and instigate personal attacks on some in areas of their personal lives that were intended to create problems for them. This happened to me. Someone sent a personal e-mail about me to an organization I volunteer for in an attempt to slander me. It backfired on them, as well it should have, because the identity of the instigator was discovered. What this does is it makes people afraid to participate anymore, because if you don't go to great pains to protect your "real" identity, there are those out there who want to create trouble for you, even though they do not know you. I don't know why this person chose me on this site to do that to, because this person was guilty of some serious vitriol, none of it deserving, or even warranted. It's sick, and it reminds me of the lady that helped her daughter create a facebook account to get some poor 13 year old girl to believe a boy liked her, and then publicly spurn her. That poor kid wound up committing suicide.

I wish it had not come to this. There are some who are happy to break up what they refer to as "cliques" on pages like this, only because they did not belong to it in the first place. I guess the happy nature of some of the exchanges put them off, and they would have to come in and try to shut down the dialogue with hatred and poor social skills. But I am not going anywhere. I've always perused the Reader for movie reviews and restaurant reviews, articles, etc. I intend to continue, and if I see something I like, I'll continue to comment on it, and I hope others will do the same.

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 12:37 p.m.

And yes, Grasca, vanilla, while delicious, is very boring. We had some good times here, due to the colorful personalities of all contributors. Vanilla brushstrokes = censorship = boring. Most did not come here to go to church and be told to behave like sheep.

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 12:53 p.m.

good on ya Grantie...and of course that is just a meager portion of the cyberwar i mentioned

can we always recognize sick characters...probably not...do they draw first blood...often they do

let me tell u all a story...a story of a blogger who wrote poetry and prose on a site commonly known as "MY SPACE"

i wrote for 4 years there..to go to my blog one day and find it had disappeared into the netherworld without a fond farewell to me...NEVER TO BE RETRIEVED...in spite of months of trying

ditto my yahoo addy and all in it

ditto my hotmail and all in it

ditto my gmail and all it

ditto my photobucket and all in it

ditto my flickr and all in it

my bank card and every credit card i had was compromised

a hacker who was mad at someone else but couldn't get at him took her ire out on me because i wouldn't relinquish his phone #

but i'm still here

yep

not out of stupidity (well my dog Roscoe questioned that) but because these kind of people (flamers) get bored and create all the destruction possible then go on their burning way to new targets

may i poffer a remedy to comments that we personally can't remove

ZIP IT

just write ZIP IT!!!!

write it whenever u have a comment that floats like a turd in the punchbowl

ZIP IT!!!

now off line attacks....i will at a moments notice walk with any of u here that have been abuse by a cybercriminal in front of their house letting all their neighbors know who their living next to

passive protest only...no brick throwing

it took Gandhi convincing enuff Indian to lay down on 100 miles of the railroad track in India to git the Brit to turn it over to them

just to help u understand why i'm writing this

u all mean this much to me

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 12:58 p.m.

ya know Grantie...i'll take vanilla for now...but u and i both know we have all kind of great colorful and good tasty words available to make a fabulous Sundae with

i'm sorry peeps but it's usually off the beaten trax mode for me..and tell me good yarn and i'll follow u anywhere...except off the READER

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 1:06 p.m.

Oh, I am sure my experience hardly touched the tip of the iceberg. Your experience just goes to show what kind of demented personalities you can encounter when you start a blog or participate on one. Lots of people have online social lives and have a really good time. But for some, their only goal is to wreak havoc. These people are scary, because like you mentioned, they have nothing but time, and when they are done ruining a strangers life, they move on to the next victim. They pay for it, though. To channel that much energy into something so destructive makes you wonder - if they could devote that much energy into something good, they might actually be worth a s***.

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 1:17 p.m.

it took me month to sort it out...professional coming thru my computer and removing improprietric registry entries

and changing ALL my passwords for everything every 2 months for a year

tell me i don't have a good memory...hahahahahahahahahahaha

off the beaten track

they're smoking goat in North Park!!!

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 1:32 p.m.

i wuz 2 excited about the goat to speel right on that last comment homeys

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 3:01 p.m.

hahahahahahahahaha.....no missy..... goats aren't smoking...they r being smoked...oooooooo...that actually sounds cruel

this may be a PETA moment....

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 3:44 p.m.

Oh, I get it. We smoke goats. How do you roll a goat?

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 4:20 p.m.

I roll goats carefully - especially billy goats - as you have to watch out for their butts. Some will chew on your clothes or in this case (metaphorically of course) your soul.

Some of our favorites will never come back because they have been thrown into the darkness.

Personally, I prefer Ben and Jerry's Coffee Health Bar Crunch any day because it has variety which is what I think you are sad to see go. Not the meanness, the variety.

If we want to see some familiar faces who have nothing wrong, perhaps we need to ask for their return through official channels.

I need to see Dr. Peanut pronto and get her take on these feline matters.

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 4:31 p.m.

They just announced they are discontinuing French Vanilla! I'm not kidding. My husband just told me "hey, BR is not going to serve FV anymore" and I thought, "that's a weird coincidence."

If my spelling sucks in the future, it is because I am practicing losing my dependence on spellcheck. I have to answer essay questions during my class (no computers allowed), and I realized that my spelling has somewhat deteriorated.

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 4:38 p.m.

Just a small note about vanilla ice cream. Kirkland brand from the you know where big store is the absolute best. It has character.

There were certainly some characters here in past life.

However, some took the route of personal attacks and threats to invade others' privacy as their sole mission. It became a real cat fight (sorry Dr. Peanut) with both male and female gatos flinging clumps from their personal litter boxes at others.

In a move to stop the flinging rules were enforced. But, and this is the big but of butts, the rules are subject to interpretation much like the rules of law.

The interpretative part rightfully punished some and gave others a pass who violated them. Maybe they were such old cats that it would have been cruel to punish them ? Feline rights and all that jazz.

Some have gone who richly deserved the darkness and time out forever in their litter boxes. Some have been unjustly thrown out. And most upsetting for me personally some have remained to fling another day. And they will. It is, after all, about character and past behavior as indicators of future flinging.

Is there a doctor in the house ?

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 4:41 p.m.

I had to spell soliloquy the other day on a test. I think I wrote "siloquey". I just had to look up the correct spelling, so I have already failed in my attempts toward betterment.

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 4:51 p.m.

It is not about spelling. It is about intent. Some of the fling masters should never have been allowed to return as self appointed Forum Gods or Goddesses.

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 5:11 p.m.

Life without spell check is like life without French Vanilla ice cream. Einstein or some other great thinker said that.

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 5:38 p.m.

I prefer life without both, as they tend to make one fat, either of brain or gut. There is much to be said about the banishment of some deserving or less, but Dr. Peanut has other pressing matters to contend to, as she is embarking on a Saturday night adventure, and must lick her fur to a shiny sheen and speak of things that attract both the quick and the dead.

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Jay Allen Sanford July 17, 2010 @ 5:50 p.m.

Glad you're back to blogging on the site, Nan!

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 5:57 p.m.

" Things that attract the quick and the dead " poses a mystery, Dr. Peanut. Perchance when the event is over, could you please explain ? Alas, there is no doctor in the house.

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MsGrant July 17, 2010 @ 6:13 p.m.

No need to explain, but I will succumb. They are what is commonly referred to as "foils". In the end, even though they both have a commonality, one is less secure and falls victim to the quick.

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 7:11 p.m.

quick ...dead...nonono...ICE CREAM...i got French Vanilla from Von's and A and W Rootbeer...let us rise above all this redundancy and FLOAT!!!!

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 7:13 p.m.

Thx Jas...ya want a ICE CREAM FLOAT?? ;-)

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 7:15 p.m.

and Grasca...many floats have been sent as "sorries and or bribes" and we's waiting to see what happens

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 7:16 p.m.

u have fun out wid da big guy tonite Grantie...cya soon

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 7:31 p.m.

Thanks, Dr. Peanut.

Did I see the word "bribe" in print here on the reader site ? Could this be a cause for alarm, for removal, and other such torture ?

I want one who is gone, and only one, to return.

Enough. Inside joke.

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nan shartel July 17, 2010 @ 7:44 p.m.

for her the bribe might be this Grasca

·´¯·.¸¸..>·.¸´¯·.¸¸..>.·´¯·.¸¸..>·´¯·.¸¸..>·´¯`·.¸¸..>

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Grasca July 17, 2010 @ 7:58 p.m.

We are in total agreement.

Mordita it is.

Never Enough Fancy Feast for the kitties. Fishy variety.

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MsGrant July 18, 2010 @ 7:16 a.m.

Ha, ha!! Dr. Peanut apologizes for her cryptic puzzle, and assures that it was not intended for any present company, and some not present. Enough said.

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nan shartel July 18, 2010 @ 9:04 a.m.

enuff said...never enuff...oh and u have some ice cream running down ur chin :-)

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Grasca July 18, 2010 @ 1:08 p.m.

Should I feel quick or dead ? Only Dr. Peanut knows for sure.

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Robert Johnston July 18, 2010 @ 5:22 p.m.

Excuse me while I spoon up a dish before I add my two cents.

I'm thankful that we have a place to exchange ideas and feelings here at SD Reader. I have seen both the good and the outright rancid...and the writers could either prosper, or be asked to find a new blogsite.

And, yes, it hurts when we lose members. However, for each member who leaves our etherspace, there might be new members who will try their hand here.

While we mourn our losses, we must, as a community, move on and grow. We must encourage new bloggers to join us here. And we must do what we do best...keep on writing!

Do not mind me if I pour myself a straight root beer--it's hot and my thirst knows no ends!

--LPR

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nan shartel July 18, 2010 @ 8:22 p.m.

root beer only is fine with me Robbiebear...yes write..the standard of all blog sites...keep writing

and mourn loss..and good taste and rendered sensibilities...even raised fists...take that time to stop and survey the scene...place it in ones mind in ways that make the event clarified

i will write LPR...u and all the other good authentic writers here inspire me...but there r condition and constraints that should not simply be overlooked

one good writer doesn't simply replace another gone...a new writer may bring much unrealized before...but only adds to the whole...does not take up another legitimate space

but i agree...good writers will shy away from site chicanery and that's the best reason to clean up ones messes so they can be welcomed

of course ice cream and root beer on hot days could be an incentive for them to come...hahahahaha

thx for coming by LPR...it's always nice to cya hun

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nan shartel July 18, 2010 @ 8:49 p.m.

enough of 2 poems that are really worth reading...tasty fare

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Grasca July 18, 2010 @ 9:32 p.m.

We are all interconnected. Every absence diminishes us. Every addition enriches us.

John Donne knew this and wrote a meditation on the matter.

"No Man Is an Island" by John Donne

No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main. If a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of they friend's or of thine own were: Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

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nan shartel July 18, 2010 @ 10:04 p.m.

"For Whom The Bells Toll"...one of my favorite Hemingway books..

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Grasca July 18, 2010 @ 10:17 p.m.

Hemingway was the ultimate ex pat who was rich and successful enough to own his Cuban Finca but could travel the world. Ending his life by his own hand back in Ketchum, Idaho seemed almost ironic. It is as if he came home to die on American soil. A family history of multiple suicides, alcoholism, and depression plus his serious head injuries in some senses made his manner of death inevitable. Not all ex pats can achieve Hemingway's success because they lack his genius and discipline. I suppose that many have tried or are trying.

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nan shartel July 19, 2010 @ 8:36 a.m.

his intense love of Bullfighting and the way he wrote of it drew me 2 him....i used to go to the fights in Tijuana

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Grasca July 19, 2010 @ 11:24 a.m.

Most travelers (with good reason) are reluctant to cross the border. While the violence is mostly targeted, the fear is that one may be caught in the cross fire. Certainly the recent incident where 2 American Consulate employees were killed in Juarez adds to that concern. Before anyone goes ballistic on the topic, I do understand that travel warnings are issued for other parts of the world. However, Baja is closer than Africa or parts of the Middle East.

Hemingway would probably consider it a personal challenge to explore dangerous places as he did so as World War 2 journalist/correspondent along with this third wife, Martha Gelhorn, whose life story in some ways, rivals his. Both spent many years abroad as successful and well recognized members of the ex pat community.

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nan shartel July 29, 2010 @ 1:39 p.m.

Hemingway did live in a simpler more macho time Grasca...and his tyle was so different from writers who came before that i did like him a lot

my favorite Hemingway book was his slim "the Old Man and The Sea"

a treatise on the "never giving up" quality that defies getting OLD

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nan shartel July 29, 2010 @ 1:40 p.m.

my favorite writer of that genre was Steinbeck

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nan shartel July 29, 2010 @ 2:06 p.m.

MINE 2 GRANTIE...WHEN I WAS YOUNG I HAVE A WONDERFUL MAN IN MY LIFE FOR 7 YEARS...HE USE TO READ TO THE KIDS AT NITE BEFORE THE WENT TO BED..THEY WERE LIKE 6/8

the first book he read to them was "The Red Pony"...the second was "The Pearl"

he was a brilliant man..a PHD in business from Harvard...and he always explained to the kids and me to the moral of each chapter he read...we talked about the book..communicated and learned about the characters and what they were doing and what they were all about

the story of "The Pearl" has more philosophy we all need to understand in it then any book i've ever read except "A Tree Grows In Brooklyn"

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MsGrant July 29, 2010 @ 2:33 p.m.

PhD from Harvard in business AND a philosopher?!?!? Man, nan, you know how to pick 'em! My husband has a degree in finance and draws the most amazing things. Not anymore, but when he was younger. I find that combination so attractive, that combination of brains and artist. It makes for good company. My copy of "The Pearl" got lost somewhere in my travels, but it had been read so many times that it was falling apart. I read it in 7th grade English the first time and we were able to keep the book. Everyone should read that book.

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nan shartel July 29, 2010 @ 4:50 p.m.

every adult thing i learned i learned from that man...he was a natural teacher and i owe the world to him Grantie

sounds like ur man is no slouch sweets...

we b berry special ladies i think to attract such polished and sophisticated men

we's neat!!!

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

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nan shartel July 29, 2010 @ 4:51 p.m.

and i agree...everyone SHOULD READ that book

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MsGrant July 29, 2010 @ 4:59 p.m.

Yeah, my husband. I think I'll keep him.

Ha, ha! Remember that old commercial from the '70s? My wife, I think I'll keep her?

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nan shartel July 29, 2010 @ 5:10 p.m.

yeah...my guy didn't want to keep me ultimately...but he stayed long enough to be a very important person in my life

that's enough.... one of those "here for a reason" men...to educate me

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