Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Gold amid the dross

Why was I reading a listicle at Cracked.com? No idea. But I liked what I read there.

I mean, "13 Photos That Shatter Your Image of Famous People (Part 2)"? Really? Didn't I have something better to do, like blog here at The Big Screen? Yes, yes I did. But first, it's sharing time.

Do you remember how old you were when you discovered that Star Wars was not a great movie? Heck, do you remember how old you were when you discovered that Star Wars was the kind of thing that could be subjected to criticism at all? (Grumpy Old Men like my partner Scott Marks need not reply, unless it's funny.)

I got my first hint sometime in the early '80s, thanks to the newspaper comic strip Bloom County.

http://www.sandiegoreader.com/users/photos/2013/aug/20/51692/

That was some serious cognitive dissonance, right there. "How could my beloved Bloom County be going after my beloved Star Wars?" I asked my Luke Skywalker in Hoth Fatigues action figure.

http://www.sandiegoreader.com/users/photos/2013/aug/20/51697/

But answer gave he none.

It was too awful. I buried the memory and didn't think of the matter again until freshman year of college, when I saw Star Wars: Episode IV: A New Hope again for the first time in a decade. And...the dialogue. And the delivery. Power converters! Oh, dear.

Of course, it only got worse from there. By the time Modern Humorist and its Star Saga Saga dealt the coup de grace, there wasn't much left to kill. (Not that any of this would keep me from sinking my own children into Lucas's sarlacc pit of aesthetics.)

Anyway, that brings me back to Cracked and its consideration of young Mark Hamill. I don't know if I've ever seen anyone put it this way before, but it struck me as pretty solid:

Understand, I saw the original Star Wars in the theater when I was 3 years old. I saw Return of the Jedi when I was 9. I don't know at what point in that span that I figured out these were fictional characters, but it was definitely a few years into it. So for a significant part of the crucial period during which my new brain was forming inside my skull, I believed that Luke Skywalker and Han Solo were real people living out in space somewhere. And sure, at some point I figured out they were just actors reciting lines on a sound stage, but I was still completely in awe of these people. In no way was I thinking in terms of how good a job they were doing acting, or how well they were cast -- the idea that someone else could ever have played Luke Skywalker, or played him better, was just unthinkable. It'd be like speculating if some other mother could have been more your mother than your actual mother.

So to go from that to accepting the reality of a struggling 22-year-old Mark Hamill scraping by in Hollywood, hopping from one audition to the next and trying to convince casting agents he was America's next sexy dreamboat ... is something I just can't wrap my head around. He is Luke Skywalker! The most heroic person who ever lived! Luke Skywalker didn't have unprotected sex at skanky '70s cocaine parties or pass out after puking in the pool! This is the mythology of my youth, damn it!

Yeah, that sounds about right.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all

Previous article

Normal Heights transplants

The couple next door were next: a thick stack of no-fault eviction papers were left taped to their door.
Next Article

Gonzo Report: Save Ferris brings a clapping crowd to the Belly Up

Maybe the band was a bigger deal than I had remembered

I mean, "13 Photos That Shatter Your Image of Famous People (Part 2)"? Really? Didn't I have something better to do, like blog here at The Big Screen? Yes, yes I did. But first, it's sharing time.

Do you remember how old you were when you discovered that Star Wars was not a great movie? Heck, do you remember how old you were when you discovered that Star Wars was the kind of thing that could be subjected to criticism at all? (Grumpy Old Men like my partner Scott Marks need not reply, unless it's funny.)

I got my first hint sometime in the early '80s, thanks to the newspaper comic strip Bloom County.

http://www.sandiegoreader.com/users/photos/2013/aug/20/51692/

That was some serious cognitive dissonance, right there. "How could my beloved Bloom County be going after my beloved Star Wars?" I asked my Luke Skywalker in Hoth Fatigues action figure.

http://www.sandiegoreader.com/users/photos/2013/aug/20/51697/

But answer gave he none.

It was too awful. I buried the memory and didn't think of the matter again until freshman year of college, when I saw Star Wars: Episode IV: A New Hope again for the first time in a decade. And...the dialogue. And the delivery. Power converters! Oh, dear.

Of course, it only got worse from there. By the time Modern Humorist and its Star Saga Saga dealt the coup de grace, there wasn't much left to kill. (Not that any of this would keep me from sinking my own children into Lucas's sarlacc pit of aesthetics.)

Anyway, that brings me back to Cracked and its consideration of young Mark Hamill. I don't know if I've ever seen anyone put it this way before, but it struck me as pretty solid:

Understand, I saw the original Star Wars in the theater when I was 3 years old. I saw Return of the Jedi when I was 9. I don't know at what point in that span that I figured out these were fictional characters, but it was definitely a few years into it. So for a significant part of the crucial period during which my new brain was forming inside my skull, I believed that Luke Skywalker and Han Solo were real people living out in space somewhere. And sure, at some point I figured out they were just actors reciting lines on a sound stage, but I was still completely in awe of these people. In no way was I thinking in terms of how good a job they were doing acting, or how well they were cast -- the idea that someone else could ever have played Luke Skywalker, or played him better, was just unthinkable. It'd be like speculating if some other mother could have been more your mother than your actual mother.

So to go from that to accepting the reality of a struggling 22-year-old Mark Hamill scraping by in Hollywood, hopping from one audition to the next and trying to convince casting agents he was America's next sexy dreamboat ... is something I just can't wrap my head around. He is Luke Skywalker! The most heroic person who ever lived! Luke Skywalker didn't have unprotected sex at skanky '70s cocaine parties or pass out after puking in the pool! This is the mythology of my youth, damn it!

Yeah, that sounds about right.

Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.