Garrett Harris 10:11 p.m., May 23
Why does this mural located on 6th at C mock me? Am I to be mocked?
Who better to welcome new citizens to sunny San Diego than a clinically depressed and emotionally tortured soul like Montgomery Clift?
Whenever out of town friends visit America's Finest City, it is my honor and sworn duty to drive them past the brick canvas before spending the rest of the afternoon commuting with the Bob Hope tributary at Seaport Village.
"It looks just like Montgomery Clift, doesn't it?" I ask. "It is not fair what you say, not fair," my friends always reply. "You are feeble min-ded just like your mother."
Not true! Not true! Not true! Do you think I am feeble min-ded or does this wall covering look like Montgomery Clift after he drifted in from a weekend spent vacationing in Superman's Bizarro universe?
A man should be what he can do. Why do you take a chisel to Monty's temple? Is it because insane is such a meaningless term except for when you enter the brain with a foreign object?
"Last Thursday I dined with Herr Hunter Field." There. I used the three words in a sentence. That proves that I am not feeble min-ded!