Ian Anderson 5 p.m., March 23
What's Xenu? Tom Cruise leaving Scientology to impress a chick?
Tom Cruise will give up his desperate attempts to turn the works of a sci-fi writer into an accepted religion the day I stop watching movies. Never happen.
Reports that Cruise will leave Scientology in order to win back ex-wife Katie Holmes began littering the internet this weekend. London's Daily Mail reports, "Tom is rethinking his decision to stay with the church because it has caused him to lose something so precious to him. Supposedly he realizes that his beliefs are affecting him in negative ways."
Why did Tom wait until after the well-publicized divorce to come to his senses? Does he have a new picture to promote or is he really going to turn his back on the hocus-pocus-dominocus religion that he's so famously advocated for the past two decades and use it as a publicity stunt to reassemble his family and win back favor with the fans?
Truth be told, there were no signs of box office fallout as a result of Tom's madcap behavior or the recent split; Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol took in over $200 million. Something tells me if the film tanked, news of Tom calling it quits with Scientology would have arrived much sooner.
Cruise has had no problem in the past finding movie actresses to play the role of his wife. The woods are full of Rogers and Kidmans and Holmeses eager to win movie star status in exchange for a wedding ring. Try calling Mischa Barton, Tom. No one else is.
In the meantime, instead of working on thetan, Tom should work on the tan and make more Mission: Impossible sequels. Better yet, how about a followup to Top Gun called Power Bottom Gun?
More like this:
- A Closer Look at the Trailer for Jack Reacher — July 6, 2012
- Lapsed Catholic Getting Third Divorce From Second Catholic Wife — June 29, 2012
- The God of Gaga: Celebrities and Their Varied Faiths — June 26, 2012
- For the Shills — Dec. 6, 2009
- Do Religious Folks Get the SHAFT? — Aug. 11, 2008