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Following Apprehension of Bahir "Booty" Baddour, American flyers brace for increased airport security measures.

"Oh, crap."

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"It's not difficult to see what's coming, even if it is difficult to think about it" said Joe Pucker, who flies regularly for his job as a corporate plumbing inspector. "After the shoe bomber, we all had to take off our shoes and run 'em through the x-ray machine. After the underpants bomber, we started getting those full-body scans and genital pat-downs. So when a guy packs a pound and a half of explosives up his backside and gets foiled only because his lunchtime chili dog doesn't sit well, well, I don't think you need me to draw you a picture. Or want me to draw one."

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