I work in the heart of Hillcrest. I don’t mean to say that as if it’s a bad thing but I believe that is probably the best jumping point for this blog. It puts you, the reader, in the place. You have a mental image of it? Yes? Ok, let’s continue.

Where I work requires me to spend a fair amount of time on the roads. I see a lot of unique things, for lack of better words. While it is littered with bars, coffee shops and overpriced trendy furniture stores, it still has some very atypical businesses. Even the Rite Aid stands out. However, one thing that Hillcrest is far from short on is pornography shops.

Gee, Adam. Just where did all this come from? Well, I’ll tell you.

Tonight I drove past F Street on University Avenue near Park Avenue. I'm not sure if that still Hillcrest or it's North Park at that point but keep with me. Anyway. It’s hard to miss, what, with the giant F in the seven thousand point font size. And it’s even lit up when the sun goes down, guiding you home as if it’s your Mecca. But it got me thinking about my own neighborhood, South Park, and what seems like the complete opposite of Hillcrest in the pornography shop business.

Why is this? What is it about South Park that keeps the porn shop industry away? Hell, there are tons of liquor stores but no pornography shops. If someone’s smart, they’ll open up a porn shop next to a liquor store. Hmm…. I am looking for a new job. But I digress.

Is it the demographics of South Park? Ok, so there are a fair amount of families and such around where I live, and even some who act posh but only have the annoying laugh, that high pitch squeal that borders on the sounds dolphins make to communicate. But why has that stopped the porn shops before? Does South Park have its own constitution or set of laws, one of them banning the sale of pornography? What is it, South Park, that pornography did to you?

I’m not a pornography connoisseur. I don’t pretend I know more than two sites that I can go to without getting pop-up windows or viruses. So I really am not all that upset by the lack of porn shops in South Park. I guess I just never noticed it before and it surprised me. It snuck up on me when I least expected it. You know, like porn has a tendency to do.

Comments

CuddleFish Dec. 6, 2009 @ 12:44 a.m.

You know two porn sites that doesn't have pop-up windows or viruses?????

Dang, Adam, share them with the world!!!!

As for the lack of porn shops in South Park, if there never was one there, or if there was one and it closed, chances are there won't be another one. There are a ton of restrictions on them, and if they need any kind of variance the local planning group probably won't approve.

The ones that exist now can't move or do anything with their properties for that reason. Cities just wait for them to ask for permits or close their doors, to try to get rid of them for good.

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SDaniels Dec. 6, 2009 @ 7:57 a.m.

Love the title of this blog, Adam. But for the love of all that is good and fair and provocative in your blogs--please please please refrain from using this phrase, if you can:

"But I digress."

Whew, I said it. Thanks. It has nothing to do with you, btw., though a few bloggers will understand.

So to the topic at hand...looks like CF knows more about zoning than we do, so I'll say that I'm just glad we don't have a porn shop anywhere near us. We already have two liquor/deli stores across the street from one another, and a number of often belligerently drunk homeless guys parasiting upon them. If you bring in the porn shop, you are going to attract a pervy seedy element.

I have nothing against porn, and see that it is a perfectly legitimate accessory to one's sexual wardrobe, but hell yes, NIMBY. I used to have a teaching job in Kearny Mesa, after which I'd have to wait for the bus at a stop in front of a porn superstore; I got very tired of suffering the stares and pervy eye-maulings from its stream of clientel, not to mention the occasional shout or whistle, as if I'm going to walk over and say "Hi, how are you? Whatcha doing this fine afternoon? Oh, going in for the film booths, or just picking up some reel?" ;)

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RobertScorpio Dec. 6, 2009 @ 9:12 a.m.

There is a reason why most major cities have a 'central' hub like Hillcrest. The term 'bottled up' might come to mind, or,the word isolated might be another.

Hillcrest is like that old aunt/uncle that families keep up in the attic. When new comers arrive to San Diego we natives 'educate' them on the 'buzz word' ares. Hillcrest, South Mission Beach, El Cajon Blvd, for their various 'attactions' and 'danger' elements as well.

Reminds me of the time I was in Hobart; but I digress.

Hillcrest does provide a very valuable service, and we should all be thankful, and sleep safe at night, knowing just what it is.

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PistolPete Dec. 6, 2009 @ 9:16 a.m.

I digress just because I'm in a bad mood.

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Adam92102 Dec. 6, 2009 @ 9:41 a.m.

Aw, but SD, I like "but I digress." Yeah, it's a bit overused and even sounds way cheeky but... sigh. Fine. I'll stop using it. But I pro-gress (hehe). Can I ask why you have an issue with it or should I just let it go?

CF, those two sites... I'll never tell 'cause once I do, everyone will go to them and the next thing you know they'll be pay sites. Bastards.

Robert, I've lived in San Diego for just under two years now. In that time I have lived in the Kensington/Talmadge area, also lived way up in Poway for six months (which while pretty was a bit far from where I worked), and now in South Park. Fortunately I've spent a good amount of time out and about so I totally see what you're saying about how there seem to be some parts that have "Take Your Out-of-Town Guests Here" posted everywhere.

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MsGrant Dec. 6, 2009 @ 11:50 a.m.

"pervy eye-maulings" - that's great!

Just finished some tomato soup - but I digest.

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antigeekess Dec. 6, 2009 @ 12:02 p.m.

Re #7:

"pervy eye-maulings" - that's great!

It is, isn't it? Very descriptive. My patience for them has grown thin at my age. I mean, I REALLY feel like I've done my time putting up with this bulls***. I'm entitled to my retirement from being ogled. I am officially a No Ogle Zone. If it continues for more than a few seconds, said weiner wanker can expect to be greeted with a loud "WHAT?!?!?" voiced in his direction. This seems to snap them out of their pervy reverie.

Pervireverie?...

Okay, I coined it, you define it. Defnition contest, writers. The best one we can try to sneak into the Urban Dictionary.

:)

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MsGrant Dec. 6, 2009 @ 12:13 p.m.

Pervireverie: The act of staring at female pulchritude without breaking your gaze until the object of your unsolicited attention tells you to stop it, you filthy pig!!

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CuddleFish Dec. 6, 2009 @ 1:33 p.m.

Claymates must be granted a pervy eye-mauling exemption!!!

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FullFlavorPike Dec. 7, 2009 @ 11:08 a.m.

Pervireverie: getting lost in unexpected (though seldom unpleasant) lascivious daydreams involving hot strangers. Harmless behavior best indulged ;)

I wonder, most of the time, why there are still porn shops at ALL in the era of free, cheap, interwebs porn straight to your living room (or wherever you do your self-gratification--not my bidness, yo!) Why buy the cow, you know? I can see the function of the porn shop as cruising site, which seems to still hold some relevance in the various marginalized sexual communities of twenty-first century America. But when you can get your toys and porn online for cheaper without leaving the house and interrupting the spank sesh, why do porn stores still exist?

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Adam92102 Dec. 7, 2009 @ 12:30 p.m.

While it is the 21st century, it's still pretty much the infancy stage of the 21st century. While it may feel like forever, the internet really hasn't been around long enough to where NOT having access to the internet is akin to still having a rotary phone. Not everyone has full access to the internet so hitting up F Street for a movie will have to suffice in times of need.

I think another reason they exist is because there's almost a nostalgic sense of responsibility there. The old perverts just refuse to pull the plug. It's the same reason there are still record stores in existence, because sometimes people like the look of a vinyl record or want to read the liner notes that comes with the CD. In fact, it's very similar to why I cringe at "e-books." What a shame it will be for the "reader" to miss out on the sound of a page turning or the smell of the paper and ink. Anyway.

Those are my theories as to why they still hang around.

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FullFlavorPike Dec. 7, 2009 @ 12:39 p.m.

"The old perverts just refuse to pull the plug."

Has a better phrase been uttered in English?

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SDaniels Dec. 7, 2009 @ 5:40 p.m.

If they refused to pull the plug, they would stop being old perverts, now, wouldn't they? ;)

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rickeysays Dec. 7, 2009 @ 7:02 p.m.

Ms. Grant, you must be a milf if this is still such a problem for you. Your husband's a lucky guy.

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alanrovel Jan. 21, 2012 @ 6:03 p.m.

I lived in San Diego for the better part of the 80's, prior to moving to San Francisco, and then L.A.; and the one thing I remember the most is that, despite all the City had to offer otherwise, it was very conservative (if not prudish) in the area of Adult Entertainment. I see not much has changed since.

I'm glad I live in L.A. with some of the best Adult oriented stores in the business (and not all customers are "Pervs"..more the exception than the rule.); for everyone else...well, luckily there is the internet.

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