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Stories by Matthew Alice

Bubble butt history

Heymatt: Okay, I’m sure there are more pressing questions out there but, what causes bubble butt? For some people, it’s like their body weight accumulates disproportionately around the hips and booty, even if they don’t ...

Ugly, yellow, truncated domes for the disabled

Dear Matt: Please help my poor husband solve his ongoing perplexity. When there are perfectly good and relatively new wheelchair ramps on each corner of an intersection, why do we see crews tearing them out ...

Heaviest skiers the fastest speed skiers?

Hey, Matt: During the 1992 Winter Olympics, speed skiing was a demonstration sport. Speed skiing is just another name for schussing. Knowing some physics, I commented that this sport was silly because (all other things ...

Plastic covered what off the 125 Freeway

Heymatt: Driving north on the 125 into Santee, I see mounds of something covered with white plastic. They’re on the west side of the freeway. They look like grave sites and there are dozens of ...

How canine became K-9

Dear Matt: While watching TV, there was a police scene where they were waiting for the K-9 unit to arrive to track the suspect. This led me to wonder where the term/name K-9 came from ...

WWII bomber mystery parts

Heymatt: Watching [the movie] Battle of Britain, I saw a ball-shaped device just back of the pilot’s window on the left side. It was mounted on cables or wires top and bottom. Could this be ...

The restroom gender conundrum

Heymatt: Why do gender-specific, single-occupancy restrooms exist? I see things like, for example, a queue of women outside the women’s room when there is plenty of space in the adjacent men’s room, or vice-versa. Why ...

Fletcher Hills’ mystery radio station

Heymatt: I grew up in Fletcher Hills. Ever since I was a kid, I have wondered what was going on at the corner of Hacienda Drive and Hacienda Circle. There is a fenced-off area with ...

Orange as the color of hot

Heymatt: I noticed that the cherry on my cigarette, the coals in my BBQ, and the element in my fish-tank heater all glow the same shade of orange. I believe this isn’t a coincidence. Could ...

Opposing traffic’s differing speed limit

Heymatt: Why do some local roadways have different speed limits depending on which way you’re going? Seaworld Drive between Friars and Ingraham is 55 in one direction and 50 in the other. West Point Loma ...

Government travel reimbursement

Heymatt: Do taxpayers pay for congresspeople and senators’ flights to and from their home districts or is this built into their pay? Similarly, when the president flies on Air Force One to give a speech ...

How much chicken is actually in chicken noodle soup

Heymatt: As a kid, I ate plenty of cans of chicken noodle soup and liked it. However, I could not help but notice the very few pieces, well, tiny pieces, okay, microscopic particles of what ...

Who profits from movie theater ticket sales

Hi Matt, Like most people, I have been going to see movies since I was a kid. I even remember the newsreels that were at the theaters on military bases where we were stationed. But ...

Mysterious yellow powder on recycling bin

Heymatt: I’ve noticed a yellow powder accumulating on the blue recycling bins in various parts of the city. What is it? I haven’t seen it on the black trash cans. — Observer, via email I ...

Creeping carpets

Heymatt:In every place I have lived, throw rugs on top of carpeting have migrated in one direction. They move quite quickly. Even a six-by-nine-foot with furniture on it will migrate. I always assumed that foot ...

Car closeouts

Heymatt: I am in the market to buy a new car. I have visited several dealerships looking for a good deal. Seeing all these new cars, I started to wonder if they all get sold, ...

The battling 'Bertos

Hey Matt: I used to live in San Diego and ate at Aliberto’s, Rigoberto’s, and all the other iterations of ’Berto’s I could find. I just saw your article from March 16, 2000, and I ...

Rough treatment for a charliehorse

Heymatt: Once or twice a year, I will wake to a charlie-horse. In my leg. I always instinctively pound the offending muscle group with my fist. I’d like to know if this is a universal ...

The highest chair in Del Cerro

Matt: Going east along the I-8 before the College turn-off to SDSU, if you look left you will see a giant highchair on the hill below Del Cerro. Or a ladder. Or something. It’s out ...

Mission Valley’s fiberglass go-go girl

Heymatt: Back in the ’60’s, ’70s, there was a big statue of a go-go girl on a sign in Mission Valley/Grantville that was visible from the 8. I seem to remember that she was all ...

The opposite of a homonym

Homonyms vs. Homophones vs. Homographs vs. Heterographs vs. Heteronyms

Duggars and taxes

Heymatt: If the Duggars have 20 kids — that’s a lot, by the way — I was wondering what Ma & Pa Duggar claim on their taxes. Is it possible to claim all the kids ...

Metal sidewalk markers

Hi MA, In my neighborhood, the sidewalks have these metal buttons embedded in the sidewalk. They look like an oversized Levi’s jeans rivet, are made of copper or brass, and are stamped with “LS 5456.” ...

Cable-company monopolies

The travesty of cable-company monopolies held by Time Warner and Cox Communications.

Saggy-pants origin

Hello Matt: I hope this finds you and the Elves doing well. I know I am un-hip to most things these days, but something has puzzled me for quite some time. Why do certain fellows ...

Calories out, calories in

Heymatt: For the last week I’ve been climbing Cowles Mountain every day. It takes me about 1 hour, round trip. At the bottom, I reward myself with an entire box of Girl Scout Thin Mints. ...

Timekeeping across the ages

Hi Matt: Back when I was a kid, not too many people had wristwatches. This was not a problem, however, as all you had to do was turn on the radio to any station and, ...

Bridge-construction practices and reflective tape on semi-trailers

Mr. Alice: Whenever I encounter bridge construction on the interstate, or most any other highways and roads, fastened onto the temporary supports at both sides of the road is a painted and illuminated, white board ...

Why congress no longer approves gas prices

Heymatt: Please set the record straight. Back in the day, when gas prices first hit $2/gallon, Congress would have had to approve the increase. What happened to that law? There seems to be no need ...

Moon reflections

Hi Matt: I was gazing at a full moon and a bunch of questions flooded my mind. How reflective is the surface of the moon? Does moonlight have a UV content? Would there be any ...

Getting more ink from a ballpoint pen

Heymatt: Here is one no one can answer: how to restart ink flowing in a ballpoint pen after non-use. This has everyone stumped, so if you can’t answer, that’s OK. — John, via email At ...

A roll up a gravity hill

Mattster: In my ’50s cruising days, after hitting Oscar’s Drive In on El Cajon Boulevard, one stop we would always make was at a “magnetic hill” where steel cans appeared to roll uphill. I believe ...

Only one way in and one way out of the post office

Hey Matt: A colleague and I were at the Tierrasanta post office. It’s located in a typical shopping center with enough room for traffic lanes in each direction, yet they have signs showing only one ...

Con-man math

Heymatt: My brother-in-law used to tell me this riddle all the time, but he passed away a few years ago and now none of my family can remember the answer, if ever there was one: ...

Stepping into Mission Valley from Hillcrest

Heymatt: About 30 years ago I heard about some concrete stairs leading from the area around UCSD Medical Center in Hillcrest down to Mission Valley. I went exploring and found them, but I only went ...

Turn that down!

Heymatt: Why do some clubs have such loud music? I know loud volume is a substitute for quality tones, but do they really need to go that far? Some have sound levels of 105 decibels, ...

International mail: which country gets paid

Heymatt: Curious as to how an international letter works through the United States Postal Service? How does the USPS get paid and how much does the country receiving the letter get? Do both countries just ...

The difference between recreation and re-creation

Heymatt: How come you can “recreate” something (like a Civil War battle) and it would be a “RE-creation,” but when you go play tennis (or whatever) it’s “WRECK-reation?” Are they different words or just the ...

Bullets in a bonfire

Do bullets thrown into a campfire go off with the same velocity as when they are fired from a gun?

Days-of-yore Disney

What happened to Disney’s 20,000 Leagues exhibit.

Butchery’s history

Heymatt: Supposedly, butchers are supposed to retire after a set amount of years (10, 15, 20?) because they’re otherwise highly prone to mental problems, i.e. they go crazy. I’ve snooped around a little but have ...

Rozzers — a slang term for police

Hey Matt: My English friend was riding in my car recently when I was pulled over by the police. I had not noticed them, but Nigel did and exclaimed, “Cripes, the rozzers are after us!” ...

Are cats lazier than dogs?

Hey Matt: Why is it that a dog stays firm and muscular when you pick him up while a cat goes all loose and floppy and sags to the bottom like the stuff in a ...

Where paper sizes come from

Heymatt: How did we arrive at our crazy “standards” for paper sizes? I mean, where did sizes like eight-and-a-half by eleven inches come from? Who is responsible for this mess? And what would have happened ...

Story poles and oleander along I-5

Hi Matt: Travelling between San Diego and Oceanside via the 5 I’ve noticed a couple of things. At the Via de la Valle turn-off on both sides of the freeway there are white PVC pipes ...

Why everyone loves pizza

Heymatt: So, everyone likes different kinds of music, clothing, TV shows, beer, food, jobs, cars, etc. My question is: if everyone likes all sorts of different things in life, why does everyone love pizza? At ...

Firefighting CO2

Heymatt: If fire extinguishers use carbon dioxide to snuff out flames, why is it that the CO2 in expelled breath doesn’t blow out a fire? In fact, blowing on a hot ember usually causes it ...

Some call sharrows a “bike in a house”

Heymatt: I use a bicycle a lot to get around San Diego, often avoiding hills and apparently clueless car drivers. Now, I see sharrows on some roads. What are people supposed to do when we ...

No sex offenders in homeless shelters

Heymatt:How come San Diego is the only city on the entire West Coast that does not allow sex offenders to enter a homeless shelter? Don’t believe it? Check out www.lawsuit.tk.— Anonymous Well, I didn’t believe ...

Concrete patches in the slow lane

Yo Matt: I have a question about some weird concrete patches in some of the slow lanes on our interstates. They’re rectangular cutouts, in two rows of four, very neatly patched. They seem to run ...