Stories | Tin Fork
They Loved Him in Basra
Published May 7, 2008
Najem Al Ekabi sits beneath the forest of red, white, and black Iraqi flags. He’s intent on a video on his laptop. “Look, see?” he says. “The one on the left. That’s me. Winning the wrestling ...
Hideaway Too Hidden
Published April 30, 2008
Clock’s ticking toward midnight down here in the deepest Stingaree. I’m heading for Ciro’s, the pizzeria. Why? Because I’ve spent the last couple hours holding up the beautiful old (1885!) Tivoli bar, listening to a ...
Breakfast with a Side of Fun
Published April 23, 2008
“I’ve got troubles,” I say. I’m trying to explain why I’m half an hour late. “Trolley security. Hauled me off the damned train. Lemon Grove. Must have been 20 of them swarming on board. The ...
Playing Chicken Published April 16, 2008
‘I.B.” “O.B.” “I.B.!” “O.B.!!” “OK. How’s about Oceanside?” “I tell you, man,” says Hank. “Nothing beats O.B.” We’re ambling west down Newport, arguing, as per ... More Post a comment
Pig-Out on Campus Published April 9, 2008
‘See? Skin on the ends. Never, in Fronce.” That’s how Eric says it, of course. “Fronce.” He’s French. He’s pointing to his French fry. It ... More Post a comment
Life Is Good Published April 2, 2008
Help me out here. Why is the state of Virginia called a commonwealth? And who was Virginia? And, oh yeah. Do Virginians make crazy omelets ... More Comment (1)
Killer Kabobs Published March 26, 2008
The vapors, the vapors. Oh, man. Me thinketh I shall swoon. Unlike Bill Clinton, I inhale deeply. Rose aromas? Cardamom? Honey? It sits steaming under ... More Comment (1)
Dank and Shivery Published March 19, 2008
“We’re opportunivores,” says Brian. “No,” says Jake. “We’re freegans. Like vegans, but only when it’s free.” Everybody’s sitting around two tables here inside Roots, chatting ... More Comment (1)
St. Patty's Day Picks Published March 13, 2008
Most everyone knows about San Diego’s widely publicized St. Patrick’s Day celebrations like Hooleyfest in La Mesa and ShamROCK in the Gaslamp, but for those ... More Post a comment
Under the Sailfish Published March 12, 2008
“I bit my arm, I sucked the blood/ And cried ‘A sail! A sail!’ ” I swear, that’s how I feel right now. Like Ye ... More Post a comment
The Corporate O Published March 5, 2008
Could this be it? Cue music: “This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius…” I mean, if I was looking for a sign, this ... More Post a comment
Willy's Tip Published Feb. 27, 2008
Aha. There he is. Right down the pasaje. Willy Clauson. He’s sitting under a way-big vaquero hat, smoking a cigar and playing his guitar in ... More Post a comment
Before Tamed Fire Published Feb. 20, 2008
“In case I haven’t mentioned it lately,” says Debbie the bus driver through her microphone, “I love my passengers. Yee-haw!” Hey, it’s okay. This is ... More Post a comment
Tell Me about the Cheese Sauce Published Feb. 13, 2008
History in Chula Vista? You betcha. Like, the other day I came across a couple of geezers outside an eatery, yakkin’ away like there was ... More Post a comment
Boa Constrictor Flex-Gut Published Feb. 6, 2008
Guys asleep on the sidewalk. Guys shuffling past with walking sticks. Guys pushing shopping carts filled with their belongings. Guys rolling by in electric scooters ... More Post a comment
Anyone Can Dance Published Jan. 30, 2008
“I tell you, man, they were dancing.” “Dancing in a pizza place? Yeah, right. The pizzicato waltz?” Hank swears he saw it, last night, through ... More Comments (2)
No Lie Published Jan. 23, 2008
Rose turns her back on me. She picks up the phone. “Hello? No, I don’t see him.” She puts the phone down. “I can’t tell ... More Post a comment
Delicate Gut-Liner Published Jan. 16, 2008
It’s morning. Feeling lousy. No, wasn’t grog last night. Toothache. Normally, I never take pills. But Carla persuaded me. Took an antibiotic. Gripped my gut ... More Post a comment
Organic Heaven Published Jan. 9, 2008
Gotta be careful here. To say something’s the best. But…oh, to heck with it. This is the best freakin’ sandwich I can remember munching, okay? ... More Post a comment
Pepe's Place Published Jan. 2, 2008
“Gang warily,” my Scottish grandpa said. “Go carefully, ’specially when it comes to birthday surprises. Women hate them.” I was thinking of that the other ... More Post a comment
Yes, Nuttyish Published Dec. 27, 2007
Lordy. Just lost my veg-inity. Gulp. Sitting here at the green counter. Biting into my first-ever raw taco. Looking ahead to start the New Year ... More Post a comment
Much Ado About Mutton Published Dec. 20, 2007
We're talking a little end-of-year chowdown. "So," I say. "Lamb okay?" "Baa-humbug!" says Hank. "What's this, the Mutton Jeff show?" We're cruising in Hank's Camry ... More Post a comment
Burger Bowl Published Dec. 13, 2007
Kevin's bag is still sitting by the front door, between the building's bowling-alley side and the restaurant side. It's ten at night. The guy has ... More Post a comment
Can't Nobody Lick Us Published Dec. 6, 2007
Paddy Wilson, please meet your family at the front entrance." The loudspeaker crackles loud and then soft, depending on the wind. Wow. Kobey's Swap Meet. ... More Post a comment
Mighty Hungary Published Nov. 29, 2007
Mar’a 'Yes! Spared!" says Hank. All the way up 78 we've seen valleys blackened by the fires. Hulks of burned cars, rusted frames of trailers, ... More Post a comment
Burger Creativity Published Nov. 21, 2007
Jeez, mate. I'd been honing my finest Australian for this place. Hazitgyne? Box of birds, mate, you bloody galah. I'm getting my taste buds prepared ... More Comment (1)
High-Class Grub Published Nov. 15, 2007
The jig was pretty much up the moment I opened my mouth. "Which one will fill me up the most?" I asked. Not that Will ... More Post a comment
Stuffed Published Nov. 8, 2007
Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7-8-9. Yuk yuk. I think of that joke every time I come down here between Sixth ... More Post a comment
On the Line Published Nov. 1, 2007
"Gimme four cases of beef jerky, two cases of Cracker Jacks, servings for 200 of cheesecake individual, eight splits of Reese's peanut butter cups..." Here ... More Comment (1)
Tiger Woods, Baby Published Oct. 25, 2007
Stop press: Oh, man. Since I wrote this, the fires engulfed us. Last chance I had to call Debbie at the Campo Diner, on Monday, ... More Post a comment
The Uphill Salad Published Oct. 18, 2007
Saying of the day: A poca voglia, tutte le scuse sono buone. It's on the sandwich board outside. "What da heck does that mean?" I ... More Post a comment
Wickedest Published Sept. 20, 2007
"Skogging, man. You should be skogging." Say what? "Everyone else is, down Mission Beach, PB. It's the Next Big Thing. Shake off all those carbs ... More Post a comment
Spokes-man Published Sept. 13, 2007
Oh, boy. A red and white Western Flyer. My childhood dream. And wow. Right next to it the monster I've always wanted to conquer: a ... More Post a comment
Art You Can Eat Published Sept. 6, 2007
What's that? Think I hear someone plucking away on a guitar in the dark, right here on the street. Ah yes. He's sitting at a ... More Post a comment
Sonora Style Published Aug. 30, 2007
Ten at night. I'm walking up the Paseo de los Héroes, Tijuana's Rio district. Man, this is an avenue. Quadruple rows of trees, giant statues ... More Post a comment
Kebob Invasion Published Aug. 23, 2007
The pedicab driver hauls up to the sidewalk. He leaves all his lights blinking and darts into a refurbished brick building. A couple of minutes ... More Post a comment
Tastes Like Family Published Aug. 16, 2007
Aaargh! Coffee slopped. Got a wobbly table. Again. Why? Four-legged tables! The curse of the drinking classes. When are coffee places gonna learn: only three-legged ... More Post a comment
Octoburgers Published Aug. 9, 2007
"You've gotta go," my friend Héctor said about three weeks ago. "They're unique. Delicious." So, a couple of days later, I'm down there. Why? To ... More Post a comment
Italy, and Hold the Nostalgia Published July 19, 2007
It's three in the afternoon, way off the beaten path in Little Italy, but even now, this little place is humming. People lining up for ... More Post a comment
The Emporer's Hand Published July 12, 2007
I put it down to the Emperor's fingernail. I was desperate. Seven at night, high on hunger, low on funds, and nowhere in the Gaslamp ... More Post a comment
My Shallow Heart Published July 5, 2007
Hmm. Ho hum. Drrrt. Drrrt. Fingers drumming on the countertop. Been waiting five minutes. Only one other customer sitting at the counter. Was it something ... More Post a comment
The Perfect Storm of Hunger Published June 28, 2007
The ocean shines like a giant blue puddle at the bottom of each side street we pass. Must be getting near La Jolla.I get off ... More Post a comment
The Art of the Taco Published June 21, 2007
The straw in my Coca-Cola sinks for the third time.That's it. It ain't coming up. I'd forgotten about this. As you suck out more from ... More Post a comment
Magic Moments Published June 14, 2007
I take my last slurp."Turn the coffee cup upside down," Claudia says, "but with the open top toward you, or it'll pick up the fortunes ... More Post a comment
Welcome Back! Published June 7, 2007
"Dan! It's me, CWW...remember?" "Come here. Come here."Dan Thomas gives the lady with the blue eyes a big hug."Yes," he says. "'Cheap White Wine.' Of ... More Post a comment
Like India Itself Published May 31, 2007
Luckily, I missed the bus. I was running up the road, heading for the bus stop to catch the 31, when the danged thing hurtled ... More Post a comment
French Pizza? Published May 24, 2007
A funny thing happened on the way to the opera. Hank and I had headed downtown for some lunch. But he couldn't find a parking ... More Post a comment
Tea with the Tourists Published May 17, 2007
"Hey!" says Hank. "No touching it." "I'm just trying to see how full it is." "Stay away. There's a lunch on this."Heck, watching this damned ... More Post a comment
Sophisticated Ladies Published May 10, 2007
Wow. Scripps Ranch. I've walked across the bridge above that full-flood metal river, the I-15. Dizzying. But here, 50 yards east, it's just a whisk ... More Post a comment
Broasted in Lakeside Published May 3, 2007
Rumble rumble. The little 848 bounces onto Woodside Avenue. It's, like, 1:15 p.m., and as usual, I had to work this morning and no time ... More Post a comment
The Presidential Burger Published April 26, 2007
The three Secret Service agents stand at the bar. "Seven?" asks Nacho."Seven," say the Secret Service guys.Miguel Madera, fondly known as "Nacho" to about every ... More Post a comment
Hoppy Hour Published April 19, 2007
"Hair today, gone tomorrow," I say. "Very funny," Carla says. "Don't joke. I'm nervous."It's haircut time in Coronado again. But this time Carla's going radically ... More Post a comment
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