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White or wrong?

Is Diner En Blanc worth the effort?

Diner En Blanc guests party up a storm.
Diner En Blanc guests party up a storm.

Recently, I got an invitation to Diner En Blanc, this semi-sort-of-exclusive pop-up dinner taking place in a secret location on September 19.

Diner En Blanc goes like this: A bunch of people more stylish and better-looking than me dress head to toe in white — no cream or ivory — and then take a bus or trolley to an undisclosed location.

All this while carrying tables, chairs and a picnic lunch to that undisclosed location.

My first reaction was, “This seems sort of cool. I guess.” I thought it was even cooler when little old social climber me learned there were 5,000 people on the waiting list.

Diner En Blanc, now in its third year in San Diego, started 25 years ago in Paris

Think about it: 5,000 people desperate to spend $52 admission for the privilege of taking public transportation to an undisclosed location while carrying tables, chairs and a picnic lunch (which to be fair, doesn’t require only white food).

So I signed up, just in case my wife wanted to go.

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Then I started getting spammy emails warning me in a friendly French way that all people must be dressed in white — no cream or ivory — and no flip-flops were allowed. Oh, and the table that I have to drag on the bus? It must be square and and exactly 32 inches and covered in a white table cloth — no cream or ivory. The chairs must also be white, or covered in white chair covers.

My wife is very lovely and stylish, but she’s also skeptical.

“You don’t have white clothes.”

“I could get some….”

“Dude, you’re Messy Marvin. They will be stained by the time you get them out of the store.”

Still, the idea of being dressed all in white at an exclusive event that will be attended by the creme de la creme of my Facebook page (even though they won’t be wearing cream — or ivory) has its appeal.

“I do have a white shirt and almost-white pants,” I said. “They aren’t going to be so snippy that they will kick me out for a non-white belt or shoes, will they?”

“The spammy emails say they will.”

The FAQ on the Diner En Blanc didn’t exactly ease my worries, since it freely admits all the rules can seem “restrictive” and “over-controlling.”

Diner En Blanc guests provide their own picnic lunch as well as lugging the tables and chairs on public transportation.

Thank goodness, I was able to get some feedback from Bettina Hahn Osborne, an events planner who has been to two previous Diner En Blancs and plans to go to the Sept. 19 event.

She didn’t whitewash things. She admitted that it might seem a big hassle to a casually dressed casual observer like myself, but the end result made it worth it.

“The process of getting there is not easy. You have to think about how to make it work. But when you get to the event and see everyone dressed in white in a historical setting, it’s magical and enchanting.”

Part of the fun for Osborne and her friends is the preparation in advance — figuring out what to wear, or how to decorate the table, or what wine to bring.

“We’ve been emailing each other what to bring,” she said.

Osborne agreed that the emails that I considered spammy do give the impression that people who might not be completely dressed in white, maybe even wearing cream or ivory, will be turned down by a finger-waving Frenchie in a white beret smugly saying, “Non! Non! Non, monsieur.”

It’s not quite that bad, she said.

“I’ve seen people wearing a brown belt and brown shoes,” she said. “Last year, one guy had a yellow shirt and they weren’t going to allow him on the bus, but another guy said he had an extra white shirt and gave it to him.”

Osborne’s enthusiasm for the event had me excited. Until I spoke to my wife.

“You sound like you drank the Kool-Aid,” she said.

“I better not. It might stain the one white shirt I have,” I replied.

Then my wife confessed she has been looking for a white dress.

“But I don’t want to spend a huge amount of money on it,” she said. “But we have to get there by bus. None of our friends are going. What if we don’t like the people we’re sitting with? Since we can’t bring our own cars, we’d be stuck there.”

Right now, we’re stuck on whether to go. On one hand, it might be “magical and enchanting” like Osborne said. On the other hand, there’s everything else.

If I’m wrong about the event, I promise to wave a white flag — not cream or ivory.

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A poem for March by Joseph O’Brien

“March’s Lovely Asymptotes”
Diner En Blanc guests party up a storm.
Diner En Blanc guests party up a storm.

Recently, I got an invitation to Diner En Blanc, this semi-sort-of-exclusive pop-up dinner taking place in a secret location on September 19.

Diner En Blanc goes like this: A bunch of people more stylish and better-looking than me dress head to toe in white — no cream or ivory — and then take a bus or trolley to an undisclosed location.

All this while carrying tables, chairs and a picnic lunch to that undisclosed location.

My first reaction was, “This seems sort of cool. I guess.” I thought it was even cooler when little old social climber me learned there were 5,000 people on the waiting list.

Diner En Blanc, now in its third year in San Diego, started 25 years ago in Paris

Think about it: 5,000 people desperate to spend $52 admission for the privilege of taking public transportation to an undisclosed location while carrying tables, chairs and a picnic lunch (which to be fair, doesn’t require only white food).

So I signed up, just in case my wife wanted to go.

Sponsored
Sponsored

Then I started getting spammy emails warning me in a friendly French way that all people must be dressed in white — no cream or ivory — and no flip-flops were allowed. Oh, and the table that I have to drag on the bus? It must be square and and exactly 32 inches and covered in a white table cloth — no cream or ivory. The chairs must also be white, or covered in white chair covers.

My wife is very lovely and stylish, but she’s also skeptical.

“You don’t have white clothes.”

“I could get some….”

“Dude, you’re Messy Marvin. They will be stained by the time you get them out of the store.”

Still, the idea of being dressed all in white at an exclusive event that will be attended by the creme de la creme of my Facebook page (even though they won’t be wearing cream — or ivory) has its appeal.

“I do have a white shirt and almost-white pants,” I said. “They aren’t going to be so snippy that they will kick me out for a non-white belt or shoes, will they?”

“The spammy emails say they will.”

The FAQ on the Diner En Blanc didn’t exactly ease my worries, since it freely admits all the rules can seem “restrictive” and “over-controlling.”

Diner En Blanc guests provide their own picnic lunch as well as lugging the tables and chairs on public transportation.

Thank goodness, I was able to get some feedback from Bettina Hahn Osborne, an events planner who has been to two previous Diner En Blancs and plans to go to the Sept. 19 event.

She didn’t whitewash things. She admitted that it might seem a big hassle to a casually dressed casual observer like myself, but the end result made it worth it.

“The process of getting there is not easy. You have to think about how to make it work. But when you get to the event and see everyone dressed in white in a historical setting, it’s magical and enchanting.”

Part of the fun for Osborne and her friends is the preparation in advance — figuring out what to wear, or how to decorate the table, or what wine to bring.

“We’ve been emailing each other what to bring,” she said.

Osborne agreed that the emails that I considered spammy do give the impression that people who might not be completely dressed in white, maybe even wearing cream or ivory, will be turned down by a finger-waving Frenchie in a white beret smugly saying, “Non! Non! Non, monsieur.”

It’s not quite that bad, she said.

“I’ve seen people wearing a brown belt and brown shoes,” she said. “Last year, one guy had a yellow shirt and they weren’t going to allow him on the bus, but another guy said he had an extra white shirt and gave it to him.”

Osborne’s enthusiasm for the event had me excited. Until I spoke to my wife.

“You sound like you drank the Kool-Aid,” she said.

“I better not. It might stain the one white shirt I have,” I replied.

Then my wife confessed she has been looking for a white dress.

“But I don’t want to spend a huge amount of money on it,” she said. “But we have to get there by bus. None of our friends are going. What if we don’t like the people we’re sitting with? Since we can’t bring our own cars, we’d be stuck there.”

Right now, we’re stuck on whether to go. On one hand, it might be “magical and enchanting” like Osborne said. On the other hand, there’s everything else.

If I’m wrong about the event, I promise to wave a white flag — not cream or ivory.

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