Anchor ads are not supported on this page.

4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs

Hot Off the Griddle

Let’s see if I can reconstruct the fantasy I was operating under. It starts with a friend of mine, Philip Burns (landscape architect, retired Cal professor, Harvard Ph.D.), and a book he praised, Up and Down California in 1860–1864; The Journal of William H. Brewer, originally published in 1930.

Granted, not a grabber of a title. Brewer was teaching chemistry at a Pennsylvania college when he took a job working for Josiah Whitney, California’s first state geologist. The California legislature had authorized Whitney “…to make an accurate and complete Geological Survey of the State, and to furnish maps and diagrams thereof, with a full and scientific description of the rocks, fossils, soils, and minerals, and of its botanical and zoological productions, together with specimens of the same.”

The journal opens in New York City as Brewer prepares to board the North Star. It’s October 21, 1860, James Buchanan is president, the Union is whole.

Sponsored
Sponsored

Brewer spent the following four years walking up and down California, a 14,000-mile outing. Since he stayed with families or camped out almost every day while on the trail, readers enjoy an unfiltered look at the people and the land as they were 150 years ago.

For Philip, the journal was an inspiration. He and a friend hiked the High Sierra, retracing Brewer’s route and camping at his campsites. Philip has been hiking in the woods for decades. Over time, his hikes got longer and more companions joined in. Lately, its pack mules, riding six days in from a trailhead, or climbing to 12,000 feet, frolicking with blizzards, altitude sickness, the whole deal. He usually goes for two weeks in the fall and two weeks in the spring. “I have to have this.”

Philip is camp cook when he’s hiking with cohorts. He says he cooks in self-defense because he’s unable to abide his friends’ gruel. Since I have lunch at Philip’s house most Thursdays, I can testify that he has a genius for making uncomplicated meals that taste impossibly delicious.

So, back to the fantasy I was operating under. We have inspirational Brewer journal, a serious wilderness hiker/camp cook, and your servant who’s been eating Philip lunches for years. What could be more logical, then, for me to take a backcountry cooking class from REI? Nothing, that’s what.

“In this hands-on field course, REI Outdoor School instructors will teach you how to build a camp kitchen, design a menu, and prepare tasty, nutritious meals. All stoves, kitchen materials, and food ingredients are provided (with options for both vegetarians and meat eaters).”

It’s $40 for members, $60 for the multitude. I’m an REI member. I register. Now, the thing about fantasy is that when it’s working on you, you’re not fully aware of it; it’s just a soft buzz around your ears. You experience an urge to do something. You don’t ask why. I go into class with camp cooking skills of peanut butter sandwich, cheese sandwich, and peanut butter and cheese sandwich. I expect to leave as a high-strung, gourmet campfire cook, prepared to shock and awe Philip at our next lunch.

There are only three people in class today. I shake hands with an REI employee I’ll call Jim. He’s tall, slender, mid-30s, wiry athletic build, and brown hair. We four head toward a stout wooden picnic table loaded with cooking gear and bags of food. The class runs four hours. This is what I learned:

I learned that food that would ordinarily be left out on the curb for homeless people probably tastes great in camp. It’s buy a bag of dehydrated or freeze-dried sludge at Albertsons, boil water, pour boiling water into plastic pouch of sludge, wait a few minutes and…bon appetit! Most of the dehydrated/freeze-dried food on our picnic table was not made for backpacking but for mom and the family at home, which is disturbing, learning that people are eating this and going to work the next day.

I learn there are three different kinds of tiny stoves. The tiny canister stove, the tiny liquid-fuel stove, and I forget what the third tiny stove was.

We three students prepare a meal using the three different types of tiny stoves. I select the Pesto Salmon Pasta with the tiny canister stove. I successfully boil water, pour it into the Pesto Salmon Pasta plastic pouch, and seal. Jim goes with the Betty Crocker Blueberry Muffin Mix/Simply Add Water.

Everything tasted goopy and sugary, but it was warm. I should say, the hands-down favorite of the afternoon was the always reliable stick of salami and hard cheese. That was gobbled down in a flash.

Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

OSHA rules wall falls our fault

Who, U.S.?
Next Article

Didja know I did the first American feature on Jimi Hendrix?

Richard Meltzer goes through the Germs, Blue Oyster Cult, Ray Charles, Elvis, Lavender Hill Mob

Let’s see if I can reconstruct the fantasy I was operating under. It starts with a friend of mine, Philip Burns (landscape architect, retired Cal professor, Harvard Ph.D.), and a book he praised, Up and Down California in 1860–1864; The Journal of William H. Brewer, originally published in 1930.

Granted, not a grabber of a title. Brewer was teaching chemistry at a Pennsylvania college when he took a job working for Josiah Whitney, California’s first state geologist. The California legislature had authorized Whitney “…to make an accurate and complete Geological Survey of the State, and to furnish maps and diagrams thereof, with a full and scientific description of the rocks, fossils, soils, and minerals, and of its botanical and zoological productions, together with specimens of the same.”

The journal opens in New York City as Brewer prepares to board the North Star. It’s October 21, 1860, James Buchanan is president, the Union is whole.

Sponsored
Sponsored

Brewer spent the following four years walking up and down California, a 14,000-mile outing. Since he stayed with families or camped out almost every day while on the trail, readers enjoy an unfiltered look at the people and the land as they were 150 years ago.

For Philip, the journal was an inspiration. He and a friend hiked the High Sierra, retracing Brewer’s route and camping at his campsites. Philip has been hiking in the woods for decades. Over time, his hikes got longer and more companions joined in. Lately, its pack mules, riding six days in from a trailhead, or climbing to 12,000 feet, frolicking with blizzards, altitude sickness, the whole deal. He usually goes for two weeks in the fall and two weeks in the spring. “I have to have this.”

Philip is camp cook when he’s hiking with cohorts. He says he cooks in self-defense because he’s unable to abide his friends’ gruel. Since I have lunch at Philip’s house most Thursdays, I can testify that he has a genius for making uncomplicated meals that taste impossibly delicious.

So, back to the fantasy I was operating under. We have inspirational Brewer journal, a serious wilderness hiker/camp cook, and your servant who’s been eating Philip lunches for years. What could be more logical, then, for me to take a backcountry cooking class from REI? Nothing, that’s what.

“In this hands-on field course, REI Outdoor School instructors will teach you how to build a camp kitchen, design a menu, and prepare tasty, nutritious meals. All stoves, kitchen materials, and food ingredients are provided (with options for both vegetarians and meat eaters).”

It’s $40 for members, $60 for the multitude. I’m an REI member. I register. Now, the thing about fantasy is that when it’s working on you, you’re not fully aware of it; it’s just a soft buzz around your ears. You experience an urge to do something. You don’t ask why. I go into class with camp cooking skills of peanut butter sandwich, cheese sandwich, and peanut butter and cheese sandwich. I expect to leave as a high-strung, gourmet campfire cook, prepared to shock and awe Philip at our next lunch.

There are only three people in class today. I shake hands with an REI employee I’ll call Jim. He’s tall, slender, mid-30s, wiry athletic build, and brown hair. We four head toward a stout wooden picnic table loaded with cooking gear and bags of food. The class runs four hours. This is what I learned:

I learned that food that would ordinarily be left out on the curb for homeless people probably tastes great in camp. It’s buy a bag of dehydrated or freeze-dried sludge at Albertsons, boil water, pour boiling water into plastic pouch of sludge, wait a few minutes and…bon appetit! Most of the dehydrated/freeze-dried food on our picnic table was not made for backpacking but for mom and the family at home, which is disturbing, learning that people are eating this and going to work the next day.

I learn there are three different kinds of tiny stoves. The tiny canister stove, the tiny liquid-fuel stove, and I forget what the third tiny stove was.

We three students prepare a meal using the three different types of tiny stoves. I select the Pesto Salmon Pasta with the tiny canister stove. I successfully boil water, pour it into the Pesto Salmon Pasta plastic pouch, and seal. Jim goes with the Betty Crocker Blueberry Muffin Mix/Simply Add Water.

Everything tasted goopy and sugary, but it was warm. I should say, the hands-down favorite of the afternoon was the always reliable stick of salami and hard cheese. That was gobbled down in a flash.

Comments
Sponsored
Here's something you might be interested in.
Submit a free classified
or view all
Previous article

San Diego Reader 2024 Music & Arts Issue

Favorite fakers: Baby Bushka, Fleetwood Max, Electric Waste Band, Oceans, Geezer – plus upcoming tribute schedule
Next Article

Centennial Salute to San Diego’s Military, East Village Block Party, Birding Basics Class

Events March 29-March 30, 2024
Comments
Ask a Hipster — Advice you didn't know you needed Big Screen — Movie commentary Blurt — Music's inside track Booze News — San Diego spirits Classical Music — Immortal beauty Classifieds — Free and easy Cover Stories — Front-page features Drinks All Around — Bartenders' drink recipes Excerpts — Literary and spiritual excerpts Feast! — Food & drink reviews Feature Stories — Local news & stories Fishing Report — What’s getting hooked from ship and shore From the Archives — Spotlight on the past Golden Dreams — Talk of the town The Gonzo Report — Making the musical scene, or at least reporting from it Letters — Our inbox Movies@Home — Local movie buffs share favorites Movie Reviews — Our critics' picks and pans Musician Interviews — Up close with local artists Neighborhood News from Stringers — Hyperlocal news News Ticker — News & politics Obermeyer — San Diego politics illustrated Outdoors — Weekly changes in flora and fauna Overheard in San Diego — Eavesdropping illustrated Poetry — The old and the new Reader Travel — Travel section built by travelers Reading — The hunt for intellectuals Roam-O-Rama — SoCal's best hiking/biking trails San Diego Beer — Inside San Diego suds SD on the QT — Almost factual news Sheep and Goats — Places of worship Special Issues — The best of Street Style — San Diego streets have style Surf Diego — Real stories from those braving the waves Theater — On stage in San Diego this week Tin Fork — Silver spoon alternative Under the Radar — Matt Potter's undercover work Unforgettable — Long-ago San Diego Unreal Estate — San Diego's priciest pads Your Week — Daily event picks
4S Ranch Allied Gardens Alpine Baja Balboa Park Bankers Hill Barrio Logan Bay Ho Bay Park Black Mountain Ranch Blossom Valley Bonita Bonsall Borrego Springs Boulevard Campo Cardiff-by-the-Sea Carlsbad Carmel Mountain Carmel Valley Chollas View Chula Vista City College City Heights Clairemont College Area Coronado CSU San Marcos Cuyamaca College Del Cerro Del Mar Descanso Downtown San Diego Eastlake East Village El Cajon Emerald Hills Encanto Encinitas Escondido Fallbrook Fletcher Hills Golden Hill Grant Hill Grantville Grossmont College Guatay Harbor Island Hillcrest Imperial Beach Imperial Valley Jacumba Jamacha-Lomita Jamul Julian Kearny Mesa Kensington La Jolla Lakeside La Mesa Lemon Grove Leucadia Liberty Station Lincoln Acres Lincoln Park Linda Vista Little Italy Logan Heights Mesa College Midway District MiraCosta College Miramar Miramar College Mira Mesa Mission Beach Mission Hills Mission Valley Mountain View Mount Hope Mount Laguna National City Nestor Normal Heights North Park Oak Park Ocean Beach Oceanside Old Town Otay Mesa Pacific Beach Pala Palomar College Palomar Mountain Paradise Hills Pauma Valley Pine Valley Point Loma Point Loma Nazarene Potrero Poway Rainbow Ramona Rancho Bernardo Rancho Penasquitos Rancho San Diego Rancho Santa Fe Rolando San Carlos San Marcos San Onofre Santa Ysabel Santee San Ysidro Scripps Ranch SDSU Serra Mesa Shelltown Shelter Island Sherman Heights Skyline Solana Beach Sorrento Valley Southcrest South Park Southwestern College Spring Valley Stockton Talmadge Temecula Tierrasanta Tijuana UCSD University City University Heights USD Valencia Park Valley Center Vista Warner Springs
Close

Anchor ads are not supported on this page.